Some People in this house.

Epul not getting me new phone while Doough on the tele gets 2 new phones, 2 speakers and a laptop.

FAIR OR NOT FAIR?
YOU CHOOSE.

Sorry for not being perfect.

I dont have the perfect family.
I dont have the perfect everything at all.

Im sorry for my flaws !

Baby sayang .

Baby sayang , I love you so much . My baby got 2 assignments to be done in three days which is due tomorrow so we spend half the day at the library . Baby, Just to let you know that i'll always be here with you . No matter what happens, i will be here always right beside you Okay baby sayang i love you .

As for the 30T crew, Sorry guys for not attending to any practices so far. I will try to make it. Okay ?


As for everyone out there, i love you . hahah .

Baby, i love you so much ! You're the one i need right now.
It has been 3 hours since i met you and i miss you like FUCK ! urgh ! hehhehe

BTW ! my baby so hot ! hahahahah . BYE!

No reason at all.

No reason for these tears.
No reason for these cries.
No reason for this frown.
No reason for how im feelig right now.
No reason at all.
Im just feeling very shitty right now. I dont know.

The minute i lay down on my soft covers of my warm and comfortable bed, Tears begin to glide down my cheeks, Thousands of thoughts started overflowing my mind. I was in state of confusion. How do i answer all these questions in such short period of time? i feel like all my problems are crashing down on me just as soon as i was just about to stand up. I fell hard on the ground and its still hurting. The bruises, the scars and all the blood i lost still lingers on me. Ever drop of blood i lost is pure hell to me cause its hurting me everytime i make a sudden move. Even all the words in the world could not explain how im feeling right now. I dont know whether to smile or to frown. I dont know whether to stand or to lie dead. I dont know whether to be happy or sad, to be mad or ashamed. Im just terrified of everthing around me. My life is like, a dark room and im just sitting one corner not knowing what is around me. All i could feel was Sharp piercing knives and needles poking me evertime i make a move. Im just waiting for someone to turn on the light and show me that what has been surrounding me is not as bad as i thought it is. Sitting at the corner as i bleed, as i was waiting to blow my last breath, Nobody has opened the door. And im still waiting for that someone to come and save me from this hell.

But the question that i kept asking myself throughout my life was,
Why am i still smiling?

The answer hit me a few moments back when i suddenly get up from my bed, sat down at the edges and smiled. Its because of people like my friends and my girlfriend that kept me going. They are the ones who didnt stop me from dreaming. from achieving something. All i wanted was to be happy. and i guess hapiness is everywhere. Its just up to you to to open your eyes.

Do you want to stay at the corner of the terrifying room and cry till you bleed
or do you want to get up and leave the room even if takes hurting yourself but you know that the other side of the door can lead you to hapiness, to light.

Its your decision, not others.

I was depending on that someone to turn on that light so much that fear took over my mind. But now, i am still trying to stand up. And it hurts alot but im pushing myself.
Thank you friends and Em for helping me.

For my baby,
I love you so much. I cant let you go. I've given you everything i've got to make you happy and all im asking for is for you to stay here with me. Stick by me and make me smile. Thank you for everything.

For my family,
fuck off cause i dont need your shit right now cause all you guys do is talk shit with me, why cant we be normal? I just dont understand what the fuck you guys want from me.

And the rest, I love you guys. So much..

Stupid "Dough on the tele"

I hate butch.She's fcking ambitious.
I hate lesbians.She's fcking stupid.
I hate pierce-obsessions.She's fcking clever.
I hate gluesniffers.She's fcking never rock my sneakers.
I hate heartless kids.She's ignorant.
Have i mentioned that i dont have a sister?Okay good.
Thanks.
When a good girl gone bad,she's fcking gone forever,sir.

This is what my brother Just told the whole fucking world.
What the fuck !

Give up.

Hey. Someone caught me just when i was about to fall . My angel ! My beloved Em. Haha . Bye ! i love you em ! so much i can die .



Btw, im deleting my account and creating a new one. Only friends are accepted. Thanks.

Continue

Still falling. Shit.

Fall.

Im falling. Please help me.

Em.

Fuck. Im so in love. Seriously.
Baby, You are fucking hot i melt everytime i look into your eyes.
And im serious. You are soooo hot. (:
Thank you for a fabulous Day. I love today and i cant wait for tomorrow to meet you.
Im so excited. My heart is beating so fast i can smile. Oh my.
Im so.. WOW !
Im so in love !!
I LOVE YOU SYG ! SERIOUSLY ! I SO LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!

Life.

I love my em. I seriously do. Im so sorry baby for making you feel that way. I just feel like truning back time and fix things but i cant so.. Ill try my best, again, to change things around here alright? Please trust me this time. I love you so much to let you go. I'd rather get hit by a car or inject poison in my blood than having to deal with this again. I love you so much and i would do anything for you. And i promise that i will take care of you and love you like no one else did. Please, do not leave me again. I love you too much to see you leave. I have never felt this way before. Ever. I'm so in love. I love you. Seriously seyh baby ! I BOLEH NAEK GILE ! hahaahha.


and im so sick la sebenarnyer. hahahha

Two-Way.

I love only 2 person in this world right now.
Em & Halim..

If your name is not there that means you mean shit to me.
Thank you and goodbye.
Haha.

Halim.

Something halim wrote about me:

Today i wanna talk about my best girlfriend that isFarah hany binte haji saiful baharthat has been known as Fadindawe both had been friend since we were primary 3that is when i move to woodlands and change to marsilingprimary school farah was my class chair person she was the most friendly personin the class,she is friendly all the good times .The pass was unforgettablefew year after when we get to noticed that we get differentsecondary school life i was a change for us .i told her thati gonna miss all the night calls and stuff .Ive criedafter all night called talking to her.And shes the only person that i still contacting with besides suzi.Years past we both had change alotfarah from a tomboy girl become a beautiful ladyand me from a thin boy becoming fatter day by day.now farah has change i really miss the old her but the new her is more funand dangerous.You guys out there pleasedon't judge farah shes trying to be a better person in her own waythat is unique for her.Just 1 thing that i don't want isto lose such a good friend like her farah .I cant imagine life without her in my storyshes the reason for breathing,the cause for myliving.without her in my world,i felt hopeless,useless and dead.i would just wish for my life to be shortenby the times you left me.countless,which means my days arenumbered.i had always wished for a wishing well which reallycome true.why?course i could wish for you to be mine forevermy best friend farah.


I love you halim. You're the only one i trust right now in this shitty world. thank you for always being there when i need someone.

Get it.

I dont understand people who like to piss other people off just to let them feel good. If you're so emotionally crushed, Go and cut yourself till you bleed to death. If you think that you only text your ex when you're in danger of something to make yourself feel good when you know that deep inside you, you're hurting.. Then i think you should go and jump up your own ass and die. Ok, tell me. You hate her because she changed her blog link cause you dont get to read her fascinating blog? Ok, all i got to say is.. Return back to your hospital and keep eating your bloody medicine and i hope you choke on those and die on the floor crying her name out cause you know what? Really.. i fucking dont mind if you fucking text her.. Sometimes. But if you fucking text her telling her that you fucking miss her or you still fucking love her.. Then you can fuck off and die. Fuck every message you sent her ! Fuck everything you did with her in the past ! Fuck the every moment i think about this ! Fuck my feelings cause my feeling dont mean shit in your fucking thin dictionary ! Fuck everything thats happening cause you know why? My girlfriend just opened a new fucking book and i dont want to get all your shit on her fucking clean book. I know you wont get to read this fucking post.. But what the hell.. I hope you do. I hope this is the last thing you read before you fucking die and rot in hell ! im fucking mad at you ok? Im so fucking mad at you but you know fucking why i cant do anything? Cause you will get physically and emotionally abused and you will cry in the room under your fucking cover till your eyes bleed. You will fucking hurt yourself till you fucking blow your last breath ! Fuck everything that is happening. Get the fuck off her life ! you're fucking pissing me off..

I love Em. So much. Ok? And i dont need your shits right now. You're not the only one with problems in this shitty world. I dont care if your fucking fat ankles just broke, your heart beat just stopped. I dont fucking care. Just dont fucking Get back into my girlfriend's life cause you're not in her book no more. Get a fucking life. You're telling my gf that there are people chasing after you? THEN GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE AND GO TO THEM. idiot people should never live on the face of this planet. IDIOT!

Looks.

Even if you're as thin as a toothpick,
Even if you're as fat as a cow,
Even if you're as short as a dwarf,
Even if you're as tall as a tree.
I can promise you that i will still love you. I love you for who you are.

I love the way you touch me.
I love the way you run your fingers through my hair.
I love the way you breathe at my neck.
I love the way you tease me.
I love the way you kiss me.
I love the way you hug me.
I just, Love you.
Even all the words in the world could not explain how much i love you Em.
I love you. So much.

In love.

Its has been ages since i last updated. I've got to say that im in love. With Em. She is the best thing that ever happened to me although we are having so much issues. Im not going to state what are the issues but yeah. Things are going well nowadays. I just want to apologise for the prank i held. About the Puteri Sabrina Delilah. You must know that i love you and i just want to know what will happen if in real life, it really happens. Im in the wrong for doing that but.. i just love you so much that i feel so insecure.. You are the last thing i want to lose. I lost my everything. My family, friends and you're the last person i have that can actually make me.. Well, make me smile. Im so ecstatic whenever i see your face. It makes me want to kiss you like, every moment.I know we hurt each other now and then but i love you. So much you cant even imagine it. I know i dont usually say these kind of things but yes, i do really mean it. Im sorry about my parents being an ass but, im glad you are still here by my side. I'm having so much problems at home and you're always there. I love you so much. Thank you for being there when i was lonely, when i was scared, when i was terrified. Thank you so much. You know i will always be there for you when you need me right? I love you baby. Please do me on favour. Please dont hurt me. I love you too much to see you leave. Thank you once again for pulling me up when i wanted to fall. thank you again for cheering me up when im down. Thank you again for helping me when i need help. I love you. So much.

Im in love.