Gross.

Sometimes you just feel like digging your nose in public but you cant because its too embarassing and you have to go all the way to the toilet when you're by yourself and you can dig your nose and satisfy your need. Its just like standing beside a person who smells like armpit. You cant tell them straight to their face but you end up hiding behind a wall to catch some fresh air. Just like when you have to walk in a crowd to get into a train and when you turn to your right, a wet hairy arm is touching your nice clean palm and you get disgusted so you pursposely call your friend by putting your hand on his/her shoulders so you can take the opportunity to wipe your hand clean. Or like when you see a whole bunch of banglas sleeping on the void deck and you just feel like stepping on them cause they made the whole area smells of bad breath and dirty underwear.
Haha. Gross people should never live on the face of this planet.
Bye.

Sometimes.

Sometimes you just have to let them go. Let them breath although you are suffocating to death. You know what i mean?

Stewpid is my name.

The stupidest but also the most scariest moment of my LIFE ! As you all know, i have a phobia.. yes, CATS.

So a few minutes ago, there was a group of teenagers on the phone.. The public phone and the girl started saying .. "abng ok tak? maseh kene pukol?" As a KPO freak as you all know.. i turned back and looked at them.. so i was walking, not looking down. just when i turned back.. i did not look downa and i didnt realise there was a cat there. So i ACCIDENTALLY kicked it. NOT HARD OK!. then i jumped for a moment.. my hard was racing like fuck ! then the cat ran awa but stoped and stared at me. So i quickl ran up the stairs. And it fucking chased me. By then, my heart was pumping like fuck ! It was literally racing. I can even hear my own heart beat. I couldnt help but ACCIDENTALLY screamed. FOR A MOMENT ! the cat was literally chasing me and it looked furious. My luck, there's a girl coming up the stair and saw me like that.. standing there, practically in shocked ! and she quickly ran up and help me.. by carying the cat. What a luck. seriously. And i started apologising.. "Sorry.. im scared of cats.. sorr giler.. i takot ngan kucing ah.. sorry" YEAH I KNOW ! fuck siall !!
till now, my heart is still pumping like fuck and im still shivering like i just saw a ghost. fuck siall. SCARY SIA ! Eh ! for a person who is phobia of cats, its a good thing that i didnt faint. If a cat just glance at me, i would freak out.. What about being chased by it? FUCK ! Scariest day siaaall !
Okok. im still shivering. hahahahahahhahahaha.
DONT YOU DARE LAUGH AT ME ! so sad taooo.


Okok. So, the whole day..
Hang around at em's place
Lepak a while.
Went to play pool.
Went to play arcade.
Smoke. ATE ATE ATE ATE.
Go starbucks
Then lepak lepak lepak lepak . Just got home.
Em went out with her friends to causeway..
Hope shes having fun and im missing her already. How pathetic am i ? hahahah.
ok chow.

change.

Some things must change.

Hate.

Do you know what i hate in this particular moment? My parents. The just dont understand what these kids want now-a-days. I feel so low of myself. Like, sometimes i feel home is hell. Yeah, most of you guys think the same way too but sometimes i just WANT to go home you know. I miss talks with mum or dad. Dad not really. Just my mum. I love the way she smiles and laugh when i make stupid jokes and i love that we can go out shopping and still have fun. Now is like, talking about our issues like, im not spending enough time at home, im always coming home late and stuff. Its killing me. Why cant it be like old times when we sit infront of the tv and insult the commercials and the way the actors act. I miss those moments you know. Now, shes like.. you love your friends more than you love me.. you spend more time with your friends than me and stuff like that. I think that my dad is a pussy you know. He is so scared of my mum. like, everytime i want to go out and ask for my dad's permission, he will be like.. go ask mum.. or like.. i dont know, ask your mum or .. inform your mum. Everything is about my mum. Kes.. "laki takot bini" ah ni.
My mum thinks shes the boss just because shes the boss at work she think that everthing she does is doing the best for us. I just dont know what to say. Maybe if you just pass me the home key and let me come home anytime i fucking want, We wouldnt have issues like this you know..

The other day, i had a fight with my mum and she wanted to meet Em and stuff..
So she started saying to em.
"i know im not here for her 24/7. she is my life.. bla bla.. promise me to love her as much as i do. I cannot prevent her from seeing you and bla bla.. Promise me that you will take care of her.. and bla bla"

She said that to m fucking girlfriend. Do you how embarrasing it is? But somehow, better cause now, em can come over my place whenever the fuck she wants. hahaha.

Em, i love you so much. I know we have so many issues. Especially the exgirlfriend. But i just want you to know that i love you so much. In and out. You look great, you're just perfect. Please do not look down on yourself. Thank you for being here with me throughout my hell at home. Our parents are killing us both. softly. But i love you em. I really. a day of not meeting you is worser than spending 2 weeks at home. I cannot leave you. I really CANNOT. i love you baby. So much. i've never felt love like this b4. Thank you once again.

I love Em.
I'm not in love with my parents right now cause they're killing me sofly. Inch by inch. It hurts.

Well. Bye now.